“And like Magic I’m starting to believe y’all dudes ain’t that sick/ Might see ya boy scooping up a bird to get knowledge/ Number one draft pick and I skipped college/ Snakes in the trenches I peep those, get injured/ End up like Grant Hill on the bench in your street clothes”- Joe Budden, NBA
I know the Olympics aren’t for another 4 years but USA basketball has been dominating since 1992 and the introduction of the Dream Team. When you look at the lineup and see all the hall of famers and then there’s Christian Laettner. From him to be one of the arguably one of the greatest college basketball players of all time and was just an afterthought on this team. 2004 needed to happen because it made us realize that 6 point guards and no rebounding can catch you some L’s like Terrence Williams staying in bounds. After USA won the gold medal in the 2016 Olympics, I wonder what would happen if we sent basketball players from fictional movies for the 2020 Olympics. Would be your starting 5? Who would make the team and who wouldn’t?
Of course there are many different lineups that can be selected from the pool of players but I tried to not overload my team from the movie Blue Chips. Also, I’m picking fictional characters based off of the movie not the actual person or player because we all know if you had MJ, Shaq and Penny you could throw 2 middle schoolers from the movie Rebound and still win the gold medal.
Here’s a list of the players that would be invited to try out for the 2020 USA Basketball Team:
- Kyle Lee Watson- Above the Rim
- Antoine Tyler- The Sixth Man
- Sidney Dean- White Men Can’t Jump
- Tom Shepherd- Above the Rim
- Scott Wolf- Teen Wolf (only as the wolf though, as a white kid he can chill)
- Neon Boudeaux-Blue Chips
- Jesus Shuttlesworth- He Got Game
- Shorty- Sunset Park
- Kenny Tyler- The Sixth Man
- Quincy McCall- Love and Basketball
- Clarence Withers- Semi-Pro
- Billy Hoyle- White Men Can’t Jump
- Butch McRae- Blue Chips
- Saleh- The air up there
- Jamal Jeffries- Juwanna Mann
- Jackie Moon- Semi-Pro
- Uncle Drew-commercial
- Uncle Wes-commercial
- Calvin Cambridge- Like Mike
- Ricky Roe- Blue Chips
- Scott McKnight- Just Wright
- Stacy Patton- Eddie
- Jamal Wallace-Finding Forrester
Picking a starting 5 for this team will be difficult because you have a lot of players that can flat out ball and we still need the best of the best because other countries is still gunning from the gold medal and we can’t let that happen.
My starting 5:
PG-Kyle Lee Watson
SG- Jesus Shuttlesworth
SF- Tom Shepherd
PF- Saleh
C- Neon Boudeaux
I know you can substitute any one of those players and still have a dominant lineup but this is who I am sending out there to represent the United States of Fake America since this is a fake lineup. Rounding out the rest of the roster was tougher than coming up with the starting 5. Truth be told my team is going to be led by guard play and with the proper coaching I just have to hope for the best.
The 2020 USA Basketball Team
PG’s: Kyle Lee Watson, Butch McRae, Shorty, Scott Wolf (the wolf edition)
SG’s: Jesus Shuttlesworth, Sidney Deane, Billy Hoyle, Antoine Tyler, Quincy McCall
SF: Tom Shepherd, Stacy Patton, Clarence Withers
PF: Saleh, Uncle Wes
C: Neon Boudeaux
My coaching staff for this team is:
Head Coach: Eddie Franklin (Eddie)
Assistant coach: Ken Carter (Coach Carter), Pete Bell (Blue Chips), Ray McCormack (Rebound)
Trainer: Mr. Miyuagi (Fuck it why not)
Who is your starting 5? Who makes the squad? Who doesn’t? Do you go a different route and cast the whole monstars squad after they got their powers? What about bugs or Lola bunny? What about John Tucker? Space Man, Butta Man you name it there are various lineups you can create so let’s have fun and send us some fictional teams to the Olympics.