It’s around 12:30 am this morning watching ESPN as they recap the lackluster All-Star Weekend when the screen turns red and the only words you see on the screen is BREAKING NEWS. What could be breaking news at this hour? Hopefully, it’s nothing tragic like a sports death. It may be a sports death if you’re a Kings fan because DeMarcus Cousins was traded to the New Orleans Pelicans for Tyreke Evans, Langston Galloway, Buddy Hield, 2017 first round pick (top 3 protected) and 2017 second round pick. This is ironic because Boogie was just in New Orleans for the all-star game and now this is what he is going to call home. I love the NBA.

DeMarcus Cousins is the enigma of the NBA. For all his talent, which includes a 20-10 average and now implementing the 3 ball, he is known for his technicals and his erratic behavior. Pairing him with Anthony Davis is a dangerous combination for multiple reasons. One reason is that they are top 5 players in their prime and in a half court tempo will give other teams the blues. It can also be dangerous because if they don’t mesh this could be another debacle and now you have two disgruntled big men who could leave the city. New Orleans is definitely playing with house money because DeMarcus Cousins is eligible for a 5-yrs./179 million dollar extension this summer and with his hometown being Mobile, Alabama, they have a good chance to re-signing him. These next 3 months will be pivotal in re-signing him because right now they are 2 games out of the 8^th spot in the Western Conference playoffs and a potential matchup with either Golden State Warriors or San Antonio Spurs could be enticing. I’m not saying they are going far in the playoffs but anything is possible. Remember the 07 Golden State Warriors led by Baron Davis and Stephen Jackson beating the Dallas Mavericks squad that won 67 games. I’m just saying.

Let’s be real. DeMarcus Cousins isn’t a winner. He hasn’t produced a winning season since he has entered the NBA. For the 7 years that he has been in the league he has gone through multiple coaches, multiple teammates and multiple suspensions. He has already been suspended one game for reaching his 16^th technical in the quickest amount of time. 24, 22, 28, 28, 29, 33 and 24 as of now represent the amount of wins the Kings have had since drafting Cousins.

Some are already calling this the heist of the century because of what the Kings received in return. Quite frankly, there isn’t enough value that Sacramento was going to receive for Cousins. It’s apparent that this was a culture move as the Kings are in full rebuilding mode and it starts with cutting ties with DeMarcus Cousins or this another case the Kings’ upper management not knowing what the fuck they are doing.  Even though, he is averaging 27.8 points, 10.7 rebounds and 4.9 assists a game his behavior was too much for the Kings to handle. Face it, you are not going to get equal value for him as various teams like Phoenix Suns, Orlando Magic and Los Angeles Lakers were fielding calls to Vlade Divac in the hopes of obtaining the disgruntled big man. Fear is the biggest motivator because his stats are gaudy but the fear of him ruining your team will get your ass fired. Another fear is the likelihood of re-signing him since he becomes a free agent in 2018. Stars like him never get equal value when they are traded. Other examples of this would be Allen Iverson to the Nuggets, Tracy McGrady to the Rockets and Carmelo Anthony to the Knicks.

The Kings may not have done badly in this deal. Sure they got a lot of players that don’t match up to DeMarcus Cousins but once you read the fine print this could be a win for the Kings. The Kings will receive Tyreke Evans, Langston Galloway, Buddy Hield, a first round and a second round pick. They get the Pelicans first round pick which could be as high as the lottery if the Pelicans miss the playoffs as well as their second round pick which came from Philadelphia and stands as the 35^th overall pick as of today. Having a high second round pick can provide major dividends ask Golden State and their selection of Draymond Green. Sacramento also receives Buddy Hield who is a marksman from the field. In a shrewd business move trading DeMarcus Cousins practically guarantees that the Kings will keep their first round draft pick which was going to the Bulls in a previous trade if it fell outside the top 10. As of yesterday they were number 11. I can imagine they fall below the top 10 after this deal. Look at it from this standpoint, the Kings could end up with 2 lottery picks in a draft that NBA executives are calling the deepest draft class in 5 years, in addition to Buddy Hield and a top second round pick. This could be the re-emergence of the Sacramento Kings or it could be another example of the Kings being the Kings. According to a recent mock draft, they have the Kings selecting Jayson Tatum from Duke and De’Aaron Fox from Kentucky. These are two players that can jumpstart a franchise and with a high second round pick anything is possible. In other news, the Kings are making Darren Collision, Ben McElmore, and Arron Affalo available for trades as well with the hopes of returning more picks or cap-friendly deals. Let’s not forget that Tyreke Evans is on the last year of his deal. He could be bought out by the Kings and become available to any one in the league. Paging the Cleveland Cavaliers…Paging the Cleveland Cavaliers. These moves will create cap space for the summer and could bring more free agents to the city but with so much uncertainty, who wants to come to the Kings. It’s apparent that the Kings are ready to rebuild and it just sacrificed its biggest piece.

The Kings have reached that moment of clarity where giving away assets is not the answer. Thinking about long term success and acquiring assets is the sustainable course to right the wrongs of this franchise. For the Pelicans, if this trade works then it’s another edition of the Twin Towers and there will be plenty of things to celebrate in the Big Easy. If it doesn’t work well I don’t even want to know what happens if this doesn’t work.

Fortune favors the bold and this was the bold move by both teams. Which fortune will it favor? Only time will tell. All I know is everyone is downloading the latest roster update on 2K. In life you may have to lose in order to win. Who took the bigger L?

Last night was an action packed drama filled with suspense and a climax that even Shonda Rhimes couldn’t even ponder. No, I am not talking about the rebirth of 24; I am talking about the Super Bowl between New England Patriots and the Atlanta Falcons. This game had cliffhanger after cliffhanger but as Jim Valvano once said, ‘Don’t give up, don’t ever give up” and dammit if those Patriots ain’t give up. I wonder if Josh McDaniels called the Annexation of Puerto Rico for that Julian Edelman catch. Patriots must have watched the Jim Valvano ESPY speech while Atlanta was planning to visit Magic City with the trophy. I wonder is Michael Vick smiling on the low because if anybody was supposed to bring a championship to Atlanta it was that guy. Nevertheless, this game will go down as one of the greatest games in sports history. Some say that I may be a prisoner of the moment but overcoming a 25 point lead after the biggest comeback in Super Bowl history was only 10 points is nothing short but amazing. You don’t even come back from that deficit even in Madden because you pass the sticks after being down 21. We can go on and on about the game but as time goes on the question you will ask yourself was where was I when this game was played.

Earlier that day, we were solidifying Super Bowl plans. I got a phone call from my big brother about the game and here was the conversation:

Brother: yoooooo

Me: yooooo

Brother: what it is?

Me: aint shit

Brother: just checkin in. in or out?

Me: I’m in

Brother: aight bet

Translation: What’s good yo? How are you and the kids? You already know the Super Bowl is going to be at my house? Are you coming?

So I’m at my brother’s house and the spread is out of this world. Shout out to Mike Miller for being the grill master. Shout out to Cook for making drinks, shout out to Wylie for opening up his house for this occasion. It was standing room only and nothing but profanity and jokes throughout the whole game. All types of side bets going on. Case in point, one guy wears his authentic Michael Vick jersey makes this bet:

“If falcons win you have to burn that autographed Bill Belichick hoodie and if the patriots win I will burn the jersey”

In my mind I was like what the fuck are you thinking. The Patriots are down 28-3 in the 3^rd quarter and Matt Ryan is moving the ball. But like they say the game ain’t over until the clock strikes 0. Don’t give Tom Brady any additional time. Stick to the script but of course this is why you play the game-Chris Berman voice. First the Patriots scored to make it 28-9 and it stays there because Gostowski misses the extra point. Punt after punt turns into the execution of Atlanta’s chances to win the Super Bowl because Tom Brady ran 29 plays which resulted to 24 first downs. Tom Brady went Tom Brady while Matt Ryan went Matt Ryan. As Matt Ryan began to struggle, everybody starts to say and you think Matt Ryan is better than Joe Flacco. Leave it to some Baltimore niggas to mention Joe Flacco during the Super Bowl. Patriots kick a field goal and the whole time the crowd is going crazy.

One Patriots fan: “What the fuck Belichick. Go for it. It’s the Super bowl”

Another Patriots fan: “in Bill we trust”

Then the unthinkable happens. Patriots go for the onside kick and Atlanta recovers so you just knew the game was over; however, the Patriots stop them and they get the ball back. Then it’s 28-20. Then it’s 28-28. Are you kidding me-Reggie miller voice. This game which was declared over by everyone has this house going nuts and” I’m so happy to be here. This is the greatest day of my life”- African yo from coming to America voice. You can never bet against Tom Brady and dammit if he proved that statement correct with this game. Overtime begins and guess whaaaaaaaat. Tom Brady gets the ball and if he scores a touchdown this turns into the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history. Play after play first down after first down, Tom Brady is becoming closer to immortality. The grill is relighted because somebody shit is getting burnt tonight. People are furred and you can’t hear anything but loud noises and grunts. Then the toss play seen around the world as James White hits the corner and the referee puts both hands up to signal touchdown and pandemonium ensued. Everyone jumping up and down, all the Brady haters sitting in their seat slumped over like someone dope fiend leaning down Lexington Market and the rest is just in pure shock. Face it as a football fan this is the type of game you want to see all the time. Even if you don’t like Tom Brady you have to respect his gamesmanship and his clutch gene is on super saiyan.

Is Tom Brady the greatest player ever? Did New England wins this game or did Atlanta choke? What was Kyle Shanahan thinking? Should Brady retire? These were all the questions that we discussed as we parted ways with plates upon plates of food but before we left for the night we all went outside to see this Michael Vick burn. Sure being at the Super Bowl but being here at this moment can’t ever be replaced. 10, 15, 20 years down the line when the game is all futuristic us adults will be in our 50’s still talking about how this game was on and Tom Brady certified himself as the GOAT. What a time to be alive. So the question remains, where were you?

 

48 hours from now there will be two teams vying for the right to be called NFL Champions for the 2016-2017. Will be it Tom Brady and the Patriots or Matt Ryan and the Atlanta Falcons? Fuck all that tho where is the party? The Super Bowl Party is on the Mount Rushmore of gatherings next to Thanksgiving, Christmas and Homecoming Tailgate at Morgan State University. In a few days supermarkets will be packed, liquor stores will be selling their stock at wholesale prices and every carry out spot will have a special that will make you salivate. There will be some people that miss church or leave right after the sermon because once the TV comes on I am not moving. Everybody has that one guy in the crew that has the perfect house for these types of events because of the energy that it generates mixed with the crowd equals a good ass night. However, there are occasions when that person can’t host the event so this is where someone steps up to the occasion. As my brother, Tony ‘Red Cup’ Ducks would say, I’m not sure if all traditions are dead  yet so I still have hope for a fight party or Super bowl party right? If you have the task of hosting a Super Bowl party, first and foremost we salute you but know inviting people to your house comes with some rules and guidelines.

Every time there is a social gathering you must govern yourself accordingly, but on Sunday the etiquette you must exhibit will rival any charm school that wasn’t on Vh1. Nothing worse than being dismissed at a Super bowl party because you thought this was the day to show your whole ass.

Rule 1: Give the host enough time to prep the house for company

Listen. I’m proud you have a house with the essentials but don’t wait until Saturday night as you getting ready for church Sunday morning to say to your partner that you invited people over to watch the Super Bowl. This is the Super Bowl people this isn’t Real Housewives Sunday where you can just serve chips and tap water. First and foremost how you know I wanted people over my house Super Bowl Sunday. Some people don’t thrive under pressure and you don’t want to be remembered for having a whack Super Bowl party. How rude-michelle tanner voice

Rule 2: Clean your house

I know this rule is self-explanatory but everybody got that friend where you wouldn’t spend the night because their house isn’t in the best condition. If that’s your house don’t volunteer your services to host this special day. There is a difference between messy and dirty. See I got 3 young kids so my house is sometimes messy especially when all the kids are playing with their toys; on the other hand there is dirty where your stove has old food stains and your bathroom smells like port a potty at Afram. God forbid you look at the toilet and you see a red streak. Automatic HAZMAT suit and owner must be quarantined. Your house should look like you are about to sell it meaning it should be staged to make your guest feel at home not them holding their coats and looking at the walls to make sure no roaches come out.

Rule 3: Have enough space for your guests

If you have a small house it’s ok because it’s for you. But if the housing capacity is 5 this aint the day for you. The last thing you want is people sitting on your steps with your neck turning like the Poltergeist trying to watch the game. Make sure the seats are comfortable because the IKEA Chair you have to assemble aint gonna cut it especially for the big fellas. I know all about big and tall clothing but now I need big and tall furniture to come to your house too fuck that I ain’t coming.

Rule 4: If you don’t know shit then don’t say shit

Nothing worse than a grown man watching a football game and asking questions like, ‘did he hit a home run?’ Get your sassy ass out my house and take your Kenya Moore twirling ass that way. If you don’t know the game just be quiet and enjoy the game, commercials and the food. If you’re a woman and you know something about the game we salute you but don’t get cocky.

Rule 5: Have a plunger

Listen we know it’s gonna be a litany of food at this event and sometimes your stomach aint gonna be able to handle the assortment of foods so you may have to use the bathroom. Please have a plunger because the last thing you want is to be looking like Play for House party asking everybody who broke the toilet? For the record, if you a big nigga just know you will be blamed first. I can see it now:

Owner: who broke the toilet?

Guest: did you see that big nigga? He look like he can shit some bricks.

Rule 6: Don’t try new foods

I know Facebook be coming up with some ill ass snacks on the daily that people share every day. If you nice in the kitchen that’s one thing but trying to switch an ingredient and freak it into your own creation that’s a no-no (young MA voice).Nobody wants a pork chop cheese steak so just stick to the script we ain’t got the time or patience for your new delicacies that you wanna try. Leave that for your girls’ night sleepover.

Rule 7: Television

This is an underrated rule. All of us aren’t TV aficionados’ but the bare minimum for this type of event is HD, at least 50 inches and should be mounted. If you don’t meet me this requirement you have to re-evaluate your participation in this event. Please don’t go renting a TV just to host some people that’s still gonna talk about you afterwards because they know you and they know you aint have that shit before and now you a 70” Super Ultra HD Curved TV. Fuck outta here. Stay true to yourself.

Rule 8: Be quiet during commercials

Listen on Sunday the different types of people that will be attendance at your house will vary to the passionate sports fan to the person that talks in Marshawn Lynch ( you know why I’m here). The one time where all people will be in unison will be watching commercials. People like the commercials. Social media lives for the commercials. Just admire their marketing strategy and patiently wait for the 3^rd quarter.

Rule 9: Be careful who you invite

Nothing worse than mixing crowds and the event which was supposed to be glorious turns into a reality show and now the attention has shifted to something else because now there is tension in your house. You don’t want to hear these words, “oh you the bitch that sent that subliminal post what’s up now” or “you look like the hoe that put heart eyes emoji on my man’s post so when you see him you see me know that”. Be careful who you invite because everybody doesn’t mix well. For example if you a cursing bandit, I don’t think you inviting your pastor.

Rule 10: Have enough food

Look when you invite people to your house you want them to feel comfortable. The last thing you want is to run out of food by the end of the first quarter. You know people may show up late and they shouldn’t be like the big girl from House party when she said, “I never make it in time for the snacks”. Have more food and alcohol then you would normally need and under no circumstance do not double dip the chip. It shows you have no couth and you have no regard for the passing of germs and you must be banned. Mandatory food items should be chicken, pizza, chips and dip, one of those deli subs and desserts. If you are asked to bring something don’t be cheap. If they ask you to bring drinks  don’t bring no mountain chill or Dr. Drink. If they ask you to bring liquor just ask the host what type of liquor they like. Please don’t be no OE, Hynpotiq or Mad dog 20/20 in my house because you gonna be mad dog and hindsight is 20/20.

Bonus Rule: Dress Appropriately

More than likely you will be in the living room or basement of someone’s house watching the game so dress appropriately. You coming to the party in a short dress and high heels just isn’t becoming of you because for one you’re going to keep getting up and walking around because everyone has to see your outfit and two don’t be the girl looking like a hussy. You know the game and how it goes you trying to get chose and that’s cool but doing it on super bowl Sunday is not really cool. Enjoy the game, commercials, food, drink, smoke and live for the Facebook commentary. God speed.