The trials of me as a husband

dwaynewhitley1

Am I a good husband?

March 16, 2012, I was given the opportunity to become a husband in the house that the Lord made to a woman that loved me despite my flaws. First things first, I didn’t think that was even possible (that’s what I get for thinking huh). I was presented a woman that would be willing to have sex with me, create kids with me and even let me use her Netflix Account. Fabolous said, ‘being hot gets you the MVP, staying hot gets you the Hall of Fame’. I met a woman that met those qualities so I should be fitted for my Hall of Fame jacket right…we’ll see. I wonder do I have to wait 5 years after my death for that decision.

Has the fact that I found this woman caused me to become stagnant? It shouldn’t have that effect however I am a creature of habit and that could be detrimental to how I deal with things. I need to learn to live a little bit more. I was called Wayman Tisdale from strictly business in a recent argument so that echoes that sentiment on me living more. I put so much pride and emphasis on providing for my family and when I feel that there is trouble approaching that’s when I lace up my boots and go to war….with myself though and cut ties with anything that’s going to create memories. Maybe I need to work on creating more memories because when I’m on my deathbed, I shouldn’t be worried about a cable bill, I should be worried about whether or not I lived this life to the fullest. Has it caused me to forget about growth and how to do the same things that she fell in love with? Simple things like date night and little notes in the purse go a lot further than the extravagant gift. (So I’ve been told, I have yet to get the extravagant gift because my mentor is Julius from Everyone hates Chris) Maybe I should budget some money to allow us to have normalcy in life instead of just getting by only worried about work and kids. Maybe I should just let the good times roll instead of planning every move. This is hard for me at times because I feel as a man my wife and kids should never want for nothing even if that means sacrificing my whims and wishes to accommodate them. What if you devalue her opinion because you’re the man and you think it should go according to your plan? This is the first of many mistakes a husband can make. First and foremost always remember Proverbs 3:5-6, “trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto your own understanding”. The key portion is those scriptures is lean not unto your own understanding. This is the fatal flaw that most people experience and the irony is the trust that were supposed to have is from the person that you’re asking to build you back up again. As men we should never get comfortable because trust and believe there is another man waiting for the ‘hey, how you been’ text. I know it is easy to get comfortable because you are getting the simple things in life like watching sports, eating good food, and buttery yams but don’t lay back in the recliner because that’s when the next man will come right behind ya and uoeno it. I pray that she continues to love me throughout all these flaws because I never want to plant a seed of doubt. Once doubts begin to creep up in your mind, it’s become toxic like drinking hard liquor. Your mind becomes distorted, you aren’t thinking clearly. It’s a cloud blocking your line of sight. I don’t wanna have to relive the Beanie Sigel, ‘I feel in the air’ video where I feel someone is behind me waiting on my downfall so he can scoop her up (I know that wasn’t the premise in the video but when I feel something in the air that song comes to mind).

I was amongst a group of friends a while back, I forgot the occasion but it was said that “I was their role model. When I get married I want to be like you as a husband” At the time, I thought yea you should be like me but then I got home, I thought this dude tripping. If you don’t believe you can ask my wife first hand. I’m just as flawed as a diamond thief dropping jewels all over the concrete. I’m just as flawed as those shoes white dude stepped on in Do the Right Thing. Don’t get me wrong it isn’t a Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde type thing but just know I’m just as fucked up as the next man.

I was reminded of how flawed I really am in recent conversations with my wife. I thought it was just a one-time issue but apparently I committed the same offense again so now its strikes a nerve and sets a trigger to feelings and emotions that I didn’t even know existed. Then it comes off as something derogatory but at the end it’s just passion towards an issue and how it must be solved immediately. It became heated, nothing Knockout Kings worthy but healthy dialogue even if voices are raised isn’t frowned upon in my house. It evokes emotion and passion which exemplifies the feelings that you have. See the last thing I want to do it devalue the feelings of my spouse. I never want her to feel like she isn’t my partner. Has your wife every asked you something and you answered with a NO. Like don’t even discuss it first, just hey do you (fill in the blank with your own question)? How does it make your wife feel when that happens? Does she say anything about it or does she let it ride? See her letting it ride can be very dangerous. It’s a slippery slope that as husbands we are treading but the worst thing you can ever do a woman is to make her go silent. Once she feels like her she isn’t your equal you are in serious trouble. Do I feel like my marriage is heading down that path? I hope not but if so it was probably my fault. At the end of the conversation, I asked her if she happy with the marriage. It puzzled her for a second but it was a real question. What if this was the catalyst to something bigger? What if I am too late and this marriage is on a decline? These are questions that I want answers too. I can’t front I was stone cold on the outside but on the inside I was stuck like Drake in the Anaconda video. She said she was happy with the marriage but there are some things that I do that get on her nerves and vice versa. Luckily, me and wife can communicate about our issues sure it may get hectic but once the issues are on the table it allows me to improve myself not just as a husband but as a man. I don’t mind harsh criticism because as I have become older, I realize I learn in 2 ways: practical application and self-improvement. The practical application is just a situation that re-enacts a grievance that was previously echoed by my significant other. The self-improvement is me not making the same mistake again. If I make the same mistake, was it because I wasn’t listening. Was it because I didn’t comprehend the issue from the beginning or was it because I felt like I shouldn’t have to change. I know it isn’t the last question because in 2003, I learned that change is the only thing that remains the same, those who adapt preserve, and those who don’t fade away.

As I reflect on the instances that my wife mentioned to me, I began to ask myself am I a good husband? Knowing that I am fucked up my main goal is to make sure that I don’t fuck things up with my kingdom. See, I work very hard to maintain my home, wife and kids so I will work just as hard to mend any differences that I may have. My wife said it best, you are a good husband you just do some things that get on my damn nerves. I won’t let something small ruin what we have but just know I don’t like that shit and I’m gonna say I don’t like that shit, here’s why I don’t like that shit and my response will be thanks for telling me now let me fix this shit.

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Fantasy Football

fantasy football legend

When you first get that invite to join a Fantasy league whether it’s for money or not, your main goal is to become a fantasy football legend. Even though this is fantasy football we’re talking about nothing worse then beating your friend in anything. Think about all the Madden, 2K arguments that commenced only to be squashed after having some pizza, bud and some yak. Well tonight starts the 2014 season and now you get to set those picks you were plotting on like a piece of new pussy. Ladies, for some this is a trying time as the attention your man once showered you with is now filled with yelling, eyes glued to the TV and not caring whether you are alive or not.  There are some men that are thinking ‘wait a minute you had me watch all the love and hip hop, real housewives of every city, keeping up the kardashians and yet you complaining when I watch football as my AI brothers would say, BIIITTTTTTTTTCHHH please.’ I would never say that but that’s just me. For others this is your time to strut your stuff and let your man know that I can play this game too. That could make the relationship interesting if you know what I mean. While, it may put a strain on a relationship which it never should but if it gets close, ladies you know what you have to do. Don’t get me wrong there will always be times where we wish you were around. Ain’t nothing like getting some real booty after a fantasy win.

Is it as simple as 1-2-3 or is it as real as it gets-jeezy voice. Welcome to the season of trash talk, endless trades, endless fuck ups and rooting for players on teams you can’t stand. Sure, you can just leave your lineup the way it is as it filled in those respective slots from draft night or you can begin your GM career starting in Week 1. There are some games that should be high scoring such as Dallas/San Fran, New Orleans/Atlanta or Indianapolis/Denver. There are players for those teams that will go ham and make the computer freeze up. Why such a powerful machine as a computer always freezes up during a score check in fantasy football. Could someone from silicon valley fix that? There are also some games that will be ugly like Wanda from In Living Color but could provide some value such as Cleveland/Pittsburgh, Baltimore/Cincinnati and Carolina/Tampa Bay.

This is where your overanalyzing, scenario thinking, what if this happens and ridiculous prayers to the Lord occurs. For example someone is praying for Peyton Manning to throw for 600 yards and 10 TD’s in one game or even worse praying for someone to get injured. If you are one of those guys, I hope you lose every game by a lot wishing an injury on someone what’s the matter with you. This is where you go to church just to tell the preacher cut the sermon short because the game starts at 1 or you go to the next step and watch church on BET or a re-run of Sunday’s best then at 1 let the real drama begins.  This is where you hold your phone like a woman holds a clutch purse waiting on updates on scores and games.

Under most circumstances you never want to bench a superstar especially if you pick them early in the draft. But, if there is one game that might challenge that it’s tonight game where Green Bay plays Seattle in Seattle for that matter. It’s going to be louder than any concert known to man. These are the decisions that validate your skills as a fantasy GM. Should you bench Aaron Rodgers or Eddie Lacy against the Legion of Boom? Aaron Rodgers and Eddie Lacy were probably first no later than second round picks in your draft. Would you even consider it? If you do bench him, what backup do you have that would take his place. In my opinion I wouldn’t bench either player, even though it’s Seattle’s defense they had some turnover from the Super Bowl team; Aaron Rodgers is healthy with a workhorse running back in Eddie Lacy. Eddie Lacy can provide some relief which will create some opportunities for Aaron Rodgers. Will Aaron throw for 400 and 4 TD’s probably not but unless you got someone like Jay Cutler, Tony Romo or Colin Kaepernick as a backup I don’t see how you could even consider this move. But this week as well as others will keep us in suspense like a Scandal episode.  This is week 1 of the 2014 season and if it’s as interesting as I think this could be, the NFL is its own reality show. It’s not how you play the game but it’s how you set the lineup.

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An Evening with the Graysons’

incredibles

As you may know I am a father of 3, 2 of my babies are under 2. What the fuck was I thinking when I did that shit? I wonder if God shook his mighty head and said, “well you know I protect babies and fools” but this dude Sonny is wilin. Every day at home is eventful because I get to see milestones like Morgan doing her homework by herself, Reid saying real words and Hannah smiling and stuff like that. For the record, I can’t wait for Reid to stop sounding like David from Real World New Orleans. A sentence from my son goes a little something like this “Daddddyyy, swe da boo de ba boo dii swe da boo de ba boo doowwww owwww” In his mind he is saying Daddy…I’m hungry can you fix me chicken nuggets, mac and cheese and some milk. Hannah just be smiling and laughing but at any given minute start screaming bloody murder. You wanna see my wife get upset let her be dead sleep and Hannah start crying loudly. This is how that conversation normally goes, ‘unh huh Sonny man im tired as shit your turn…but she hungry quianna…fuck it then bring her here.’ But as soon as she sees her face she all smiling and what not and I’m looking confused like the Lloyd lyric (does he say She fine too or she’s 5’2) I think we wait to have for another ‘I know black people episode by Dave Chappelle for that answer’.

So I go to work answer emails, questions, and write jobs for about 8 hours. I indulge my wife with conversation throughout the day and look up sports stuff especially since Fantasy football starts tonight(fellas, you wanna test your marriage tell your wife you joining a Fantasy league, if you really wanna test her tell her you are the commissioner). When it’s quitting time, I get in the car turn on Spotify and leave the parking lot. A lot of times it’s a song playing with the word nigga a bunch of times and my white co-workers wave good bye to me. I wonder if they say, ‘this nigga here is something else’ when they get in the car after hearing my music. Cruising on the highway mentally preparing myself for another evening at the Grayson home which is something that some would say deserve a reality show. Me personally, I think it would flop but others think differently.

As I’m listening to the Spotify which reminds me to add more songs to it because on shuffle play, it goes from Yo Gotti ‘errybody’ to seduction by Usher…I know thank my wife for that shit and it fucks me up every time. I channeled Usher though from his classic nice and slow with this version; “it’s seven o clock on the dot in my minivan parked in the street/ I got 3 hungry kids and wife asking me what to eat/ I pull up anticipating/ a phone call don’t keep me waiting/ these kids are wiling and im about to whup these kids ass/ can I go to a place nice and quiet where I don’t have to fuss/ I just want a cup of henny to sip nice and slow”

But then reality sets in and I gain my second burst of energy and anticipates any and everything. I open the door, first it’s my daughter Morgan yelling ‘Daddy where were you at…can you play with me… can I watch a movie…can I go somewhere…is there a surprise for me’ All of these questions come 17 seconds after I open the door. My son yells, Daddy and runs like Dino from the Flinstones to give me a hug then he starts working on his 40 time running up and down the hallway. My daughter Hannah laying down stretching but it looks like she is working on her 1-2 combo. From there I say whats up to my wife and we talk for a few minutes, then this question…what you want for dinner? Me being me I’m like I want you for dinner. Her response, ‘boy this is how we got 3 kids now…bye lance’ First of all who the hell is Lance and I hope he’s getting paid for this phrase because I hear this on reality shows, Instagram posts, even on Sportscenter. Somewhere there is a Lance getting paid right now.

Once the kids eat it turns into organized chaos. I say organized chaos because they are all in the house but the noise goes from 0 to 100 nigga real quick, my mode takes a real shift. It’s all in fun though kids burning off energy, I get to see all of this first hand then after a bath and a movie bedtime. You would think this is where it gets easier. Wrong-charlie murphy voice. This is where my daughter wants to get all philosophical with the questions like, “dad can you be strong as Mr. Incredible?” “ Dad, why do your arms look like Wreck-it –Ralph”, “Does God go to sleep because if he doesn’t why should I” After question 3 I wanna say, Morgan do you want me to read you a book it’s called go the fuck to sleep. But in mid sentence she falls asleep like someone just hit her pressure point and she’s out cold. My son is easier throw him the crib with a show and boom goes the dynamite. My 2 month old daughter on the other hand is hit or miss. Some nights she’s out like an unpaid electric bill and other nights she’s up wanting to talk like she is quianna’s roommate. I can’t wait tiil she takes a bottle better so I mix it with potato flakes or similac flakes or some old school shit like Karo syrup. If I use Karo syrup I gotta put a mirror under her nostril to make sure she breathing because I would be out 12 hours at a time with that mixture. Anyway I wouldn’t trade it for the world therefore it’s never a dull moment in my house and when we are in the streets it’s even worse but that’s for another story at another time until next time

Stay classy and every once in a while go the fuck to sleep.

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I got a job…

new job

I got a job/ I can provide for my family/ it’s for the betterment/ No longer in the tentament/ something old and new like a testament/ here a scantron and a pencil let see how the testing went/ Everything is great/ pep in my step/gone til November like Wyclef/ doing great can’t digress/ that’s my mindset/ out the hood now you scream God is good/When before it was how good is God/ was it a façade since you can’t see him like a mirage/ but he pieces everything up like a collage/Had a uniform for Bethlehem Steel/ odd name since it made steel for weapons and Bethlehem the place known for peace/ Asked for a promotion then they said peace/ This is a depiction of someone getting the pink slippin/ close to an eviction/ attitude start switching/ services you start skipping/ falling for anything straight trippin/ at one point you were maxed in/ now you half of that like a fraction/ do you take all those words back like a retraction/ was all of this taxin/ We are like job/ but will we have the composure when things get slow/ or will we be an ostrich and keep our head held low/ It’s easy when things go wrong in which your morals you’ll forget/ but what if he forfeit/ won’t protect your fortress/ now your house is not a home no mortgage/ cold like the morgue gets/ We’re not perfect so we’ll make our errors out of terror or judgment/ especially when your wife is at the store and goes over budget/ I thought you said it was only for shampoo/ then she says it was Walmart/ how much you spend you know around 2/ around 2 you know the mortgage due and after tithing we’re through/ that’s when God assembles his crew/ you know a select few as they select you more like test you / cause he wont leave you on the strip like stores in westview/ Sure you may be late on a bill/ til you next payment/ then you hit the lights and wayment/ no cut off from BGE/ now I don’t have to BEG/ now that’s a BET/ might even buy something on cable you know a PPV/ close my eyes in my own BED/ see at first you think your work is just from 9-5/ but the real work is remembering what your worth/ remember proverbs chapter 3 5-6th verse/ trust in the lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding/ your own understanding can leave you six feet under while the rest standing/ Face it we can be clueless/ better yet a nuisance/ but you’re never useless/ but you already knew this/ because God is stuck to us like how glue gets/ at times when it should be about forgiveness/ you’re like forget this/ then remember who you do it for…now get this/ Jehovah isn’t the only witness/ for those that are witless you better not miss this/ or a man with a shovel will say dig this

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For the Love of Money

love of kevin

Amongst all the things going on in the sports world whether it’s Paul George knee injury, Durant withdrawing from Team USA, football preseason, Tiger Woods or baseball the one thing that was constantly being talked about was the potential Kevin Love trade. After all the formalities were settled, Kevin Love finally got his wish and his genie aka Flip Saunders traded him as part of a 3 team trade between Cleveland, Philadelphia and Minnesota. Cleveland receives Kevin Love, Minnesota receives Thaddeus Young, Anthony Bennett, Andrew Wiggins and 6.3 million trade exception and Philadelphia receives 2015 Miami Heat first round pick, Luc Richard Mbah a Moute and Alexey Shved. There are winners and losers (and I use that term loosely) with this trade. Some “winners” are Cleveland Cavaliers, LeBron James, Andrew Wiggins, Ricky Rubio and Klay Thompson. Some of the “losers” are Dion Waiters, Minnesota Timberwolves, Chicago Bulls, Flip Saunders and Cleveland’s financial flexibility.

Kevin Love should be cruising down East 99th Street blasting Bone Thugs-N-Harmony because for the love of money is actually what Kevin got. After his last deal is completed, he will re-up with a deal up to 5 year/120 million dollars. Cleveland is on a roll right now that’s turning into an avalanche. Getting the number one pick for the 3rd time in 4 years wasn’t enough, convincing arguably the greatest player alive to come back home didn’t quench their thirst, but now they wanna spread love the Cleveland way. The Cavs have become another team to form a Big 3. Is this the reincarnation of the 2010 Miami Heat? If so, who is dealing with the most pressure: Kevin Love, Kyrie Irving, LeBron James or David Blatt? This overhaul may not be done because Cleveland is trying to trade for Timofey Mozgov. The first question is why him out of all the big men available. Well, Mozgov’s former coach is…..you guessed it David Blatt. He already knows the system and he can provide frontcourt depth that Cleveland is lacking. On paper, Cleveland is a title contender but before we crown them let’s not forget about another team in the Eastern Conference as a matter of fact a team in the same division: Chicago Bulls. (We will talk about later on, I promise). Kyrie, LeBron and Kevin average 74 points, 23 rebounds and 17 assists per game and now that will all be one team. Will they be capable of doing those numbers again this season? Offensively, they can become a juggernaut but there will be some defensive deficiencies that can be exposed and be the catalyst for an untimely demise. The interesting thing is that they got a Top 10 player without restructuring their roster. Losing Wiggins could come back to haunt them, but Kevin is an established superstar so as a GM what do you do is that situation. They also signed Mike Miller, James Jones and Shawn Marion; will Ray Allen complete their offseason?

LeBron James has been winning for a long time, sure it may not be the championship all the time since he has a 2-3 record in the NBA Finals but what LeBron wants, LeBron gets. He wants to come back home…check, resign Kyrie to long term deal…check now getting Love….check but it wasn’t a discount double check but this will be pretty costly over the course of the next 5 years. Granted, this is the same guy that has been the NBA Finals 4 years in a row so replacing Wade and Bosh for Irving and Love isn’t a bad move and also makes the transition to possibly winning a championship a lot easier. Even though he says, “We’re not ready right now, no way” the signing of Kevin Love and other pieces is putting a plan in motion where a championship is in the foreseeable future.

Being touted as one of the best basketball prospects since LeBron James, Andrew Wiggins has gone through some changes that some people wouldn’t be able to cope with. As the saying goes, ‘a minor setback for a major comeback’. Sure, Andrew would want to play with LeBron but this opportunity to start and cement his own legacy will have a bigger impact then playing second maybe even third fiddle on a team. He’s limitless like the Bradley Cooper character now that he could be a franchise player with Minnesota. Wiggins becomes the number one option and he has a pass first, second and third point guard in Ricky Rubio so the opportunities will be there for him to flourish like a college kid getting his refund check.

Even though Klay Thompson isn’t a member of any of the teams involved in this trade, he’s a winner because the front office believed in his potential more than others. Truth be told, if Golden State would have included Klay Thompson in a trade, we are not talking about this trade at all. The brain trust of Minnesota preferred Klay Thompson, David Lee and Harrison Barnes over a Cleveland trade but things didn’t pan out that way. Instead of being sent to Minnesota he stays in Oakland and the Splash brothers will continue to wet the net.

Ricky Rubio is in his contract year and now has a bevy of young athletic talent to catch endless alley-oops and behind the back passes that would make Pistol Pete, Magic Johnson and Jason Williams tip their hat. In the past he has been critical of Kevin Love and his leadership abilities, now Ricky has the opportunity to seize the day and contract all at the same damn time.

With every trade or transaction there are winners and losers. Like I said earlier, I am using the term loser loosely. For example, Minnesota couldn’t be considered a winner in a trade that trades the second best Kevin to ever play for them; however the Timberwolves won as far as potential. Wiggins could be a perennial All-Star, Anthony Bennett has lost about 25 pounds and don’t forget he’s was just a number one pick in the draft in 2013. So, Minnesota has the last two number one picks in the draft combined with their own lottery picks Zach Levine and Shabazz Muhammad and Gorgui Dieng. So far, Shabazz Muhammad has lost 15 pounds and let’s not forget about Thaddeus Young. He average about 17 and 9 for the 76ers and is the elder statesman at only 25 years old. Sure they had to give up a guy that averaged 26 and 12 but at the same time in Cleveland, Love will not average those numbers. He should average a double double but nothing close to those numbers. One situation to monitor is whether or not, Thaddeus stays beyond this year, if so Minnesota has established a young nucleus that can do damage especially on NBA 2K15. Flip Saunders will have his hands full but he has done this before when he had a young Kevin Garnett and Stephon Marbury so why not try it again. At least you addressed the long term future of the team.

Another example of me using the term loser loosely would be when talking about the Chicago Bulls. I say Chicago is a loser only because they failed to land a big time free agent such as Carmelo Anthony or Kevin Love. But in order to do that they would have to gut their roster and their identity which Coach Thibs has worked hard to cultivate. So instead they signed Pau Gasol, draft Dougie McBuckets and bring over Nikola Mirotic. Also, there is a former MVP you may heard of him; Derrick Rose will come back this year. Imagine a lineup of Rose, Butler, McBuckets, Gibson, Noah and plenty of shooters to surround the number one defensive team in the NBA. To be quite honest, I have Chicago coming out of the East and unless another team goes on a remarkable run, I envision a collision course between Cleveland and Chicago for Eastern Conference supremacy. Sure Love or Anthony would have been a splash that only a water park would normally provide but their well is far from dry so let the clashes begin.

Dion Waiters is a young ballplayer that desires the ball at all times. Good luck with you getting the ball now Dion because he is now the 4th member of the Cavs. Will he turn into the lost Beatle that no one can ever name? Will his role diminish? I wonder if Philly tried to acquire him but Cleveland said no. He now has to contend for minutes with new additions of Mike Miller and James Jones and possibly the man known as Jesus Shuttlesworth. Will he feel the same if his shots get cut in half but a banner is being lifted up to the rafters? Only time will tell.

Flip Saunders will have the arduous task to trying to team this team around. This will take longer than a visit to the DMV on your day off but this is a youth movement that can beneficial with respect to potential and rookie contracts which can expedite the process of financial flexibility to possibly bring in a free agent. Speaking of financial flexibility, Cleveland has abandoned any chances of flexibility after this deal with Kyrie making about 18 million a year, LeBron making 21 this year and Love will be making 24 for the next 5 years.

Philadelphia 76ers has been in a league of their own longer than the Tom Hanks movie. They have plenty of money but refuse to spend it. They gather first round picks like bricks of coke just to stash it for another time. They use lottery picks on injured players and international prospects. They are on the rebuilding track of Van Wilder. But if you are going to stay committed to this plan kudos must go to Sam Hinkie, the General Manager of the 76ers Philadelphia is in the midst of a massive rebuilding operation, and trading Young was a part of the master plan. Young is likely better than anyone you’d acquire with a mid-to-late first-round pick. That’s not to say his trade value was any higher than this, but this year he’s owed $9.4 million this coming season and has a $10 million player option in 2015-2016. Once again this is Philadelphia saving money that they will not use. Mbah a Moute will do exactly what head coach Brett Brown wants on defense, and he’s known Joel Embiid since their days in Cameroon which could have some impact or it could a worthless tidbit of information. Shved has a better chance of blossoming in Brown’s up-tempo system than just about everywhere else, but he didn’t have much success in Minnesota so will a cheesesteak from Ishkabibbles change his mindset. The plan is very obviously to be good later, not now.

Only time will tell who the real winner of this trade but all these players have gone from a meal plan to a meal ticket so they are all winners.

 

 

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Sports Documentaries

I know I am only 30 years old and there are plenty of sports events that I’ve missed in my lifetime, for example Wilt Chamberlain scoring 100 points, the Celtics Dynasty of the 60’s, the John Wooden days but I am thankful for sports documentaries that allow to see where my desire for sports come from. Whether it’s ESPN Sportscentury, ESPN 30 for 30, ESPN Films, or any documentary on premium cable (HBO, Showtime, Cinemax) this series of documentary films highlight important events and people in the sports world. Some of them aren’t as famous as others like Jimmy “the Greek”, Tim Richmond and Chris Herren but their impact is still the same.  My top 5 as of right now would be Fab 5, Reggie Miller vs. The New York Knicks, You Don’t Know Bo, Benji and Youngstown Boys. What are some of your favorite sports documentaries? If there were any future documentaries that should be done what topics would you discuss?

Some sports topics that I think should be future 30 for 30’s are:

 

  1. The James Harden Trade to Houston
  2. The evolution of the Big 3
  3. The Bulls Dynasty
  4. The blocked NBA trade where Chris Paul would have went to the Lakers
  5. LeBron going back to Cleveland
  6. The Hood Legends that never make it to the pros
  7. AND 1
  8. Sportscenter
  9. The Year of 96 (NBA, NFL and MLB Draft)
  10. SpyGate
  11. Alex Rodriguez
  12. The Madden Video Game
  13. Sports vs. Fantasy
  14. Malice at the Palace
  15. The re-alignment of conferences in college sports
  16. The Brady Rule
  17. If Floyd Mayweather retires 50-0
  18. The Golden Years of the Slam Dunk Contest
  19. Tiger Woods
  20. Hurricane Katrina and the Superdome
  21. Herschel Walker trade
  22. 92 Dream Team
  23. Best NBA Draft Class ever
  24. Penn State scandal
  25. Sports Talk Radio (ESPN First Take, Numbers Never Lie, Around the Horn, Pardon the Interruption)
  26. NFL Concussion
  27. Bounty Gate
  28. If Cleveland Cavaliers win a title with LeBron
  29. The legend of Johnny Football
  30. The death of the Heavyweight division in boxing

Any other sports topics that deserve to be a future ESPN 30 for 30 or just a sports documentary period?

 

 

 

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Only a King knows what Love is about…

lebron and kevin

Kevin Love right now must feel like Zach Morris when he finally bags Kelly Kapowski. After threats, speculation and endless hours of NBA coverage, Kevin Love has been tentatively traded to the Cleveland Cavaliers for Andrew Wiggins, Anthony Bennett and a 2015 protected first round pick. I say tentatively because if Golden State says you can have Klay Thompson, I can see this trade not working at all. I have been in my GroupMe discussing this potential trade all day and one thing that I keep hearing is that ‘Kevin Love won’t produce 26 and 12 with Cleveland. He is third string to Kyrie Irving and LeBron James. He’s the white Chris Bosh. He’s a top player and he hasn’t been to the playoffs’ Granted, for all the individual numbers, Kevin is not a great defender, a winner or a team guy. His winning percentage is abysmal and according to Ricky Rubio his fellow teammate, ‘he isn’t a team leader in the locker room’ Right now, Kevin Love is looking like a light skin jawn in the sense that they don’t text you back, they don’t really need you and that they can act like a total bitch but at the same time still the top commodity to the majority of men. Is Kevin Love the light skin jawn of the NBA?

Will the presence of LeBron James, Kyrie Irving and others prove that Kevin will turn into a different player or do we need Dennis Green back to the podium, ‘because he was what he thought he was and we let him off the hook’. Will Kevin Love delete all memories of Jim Mora and his infamous ‘Playoffs’ rant or is it back to the same old shit. Nevertheless, there will be tons of attention thrown at the Cavaliers this season and Kevin Love will be given plenty of opportunities to change the negative perception that’s associated with him today. Kevin won’t have to be the guy in Cleveland like he was in Minnesota. Can this team be like the elevated version of the 2004 Pistons or will they be like the Lakers with Shaq, Kobe, Malone and Payton. Remember, LeBron in Cleveland still produced 60 wins seasons and even made a trip to the NBA Finals with players like Mo Williams, Antwan Jamison, Ilgauskas and others so let’s hope they play better defense though. For as many sick crossovers Kyrie has done, he has also played defense like Manti Te’o against Alabama in the championship.

Kevin Love is at his best playing defense when he is trying to box some out which would create a chance for a rebound which creates a chance to pad the stats so his love for his personal stats (see what I did there) has to be changed in order for this experiment to be successful. He has to become a better leader in all facets but is Kevin Love just going to be that guy all for self or will he have an epiphany? Face it in order for Minnesota to start the process of winning they have to get rid of Kevin. Also, Kevin will be faced with love and hate at the same time. It’s like the skit from Katt Williams comedy show when he said, ‘this city is the prettiest, sexiest, dirtiest, nastiest city ever’. Now, Kevin is the newest cast member of the daily soap, As LeBron Runs.

Depending on how Kevin handles himself in Cleveland will determine the reaction he will receive. Forming this big 3 wasn’t as easy as expected therefore the expectations won’t be low. David Blatt has walked into a nice situation and for all his accolades that he has received overseas, he has an integral part in facilitating this team. This is his days at Princeton all over again. From this potential Big 3 in conjunction with LeBron’s weight loss, Kevin will have to become a better defender not just for rebounds but in the post. What Kevin was doing might have been good if you had him on your fantasy basketball team but as Nino Brown would say, this is bigger than Kevin Love baby. The Cavaliers are going to need him not just in the Finals if they make it there but against teams in the Eastern Conference. On paper they look like the best team but let’s not forget the frontcourt players in Chicago, Charlotte, Washington and Atlanta. He will be up against players like Joakim Noah, Taj Gibson, Al Jefferson, Marcin Gortat, Paul Millsap and Al Horford. Those guys can expose the chink in his armor and make Cleveland more of a pretender than those stacks of money Soulja Boy was holding. One of the biggest challenges is how can Kevin be more of a better defender. Bad enough Kyrie Irving isn’t a good defender in the perimeter you can’t add another shitty defender in the post that means LeBron is going to have to do it all like Michael Jordan did in the first half against the Monstars. At one moment Kevin Love could have blamed this on how upper management for drafting 3 PG’s in one draft or lack of free agent acquisitions but now he can’t say anything. It’s put up or shut up. It will be interesting to see how Kyrie and Kevin adjust to the bright lights because Cleveland was on TV only two times last year, I think in the first week they will televise 4 times. It’s not about the numbers with those two it will be the little things, it will be the small adjustments that will make this team reach the zenith that only someone playing on the rookie level of 2K15 can reach.

Kevin has never made the playoffs which means his teams have yet to have a winning percentage so all the focus can’t be on upper management. Love may get double-double every night but he never requires a double team and teams aren’t afraid of him in the final moments. His stats placed him in the top 5 but his intangibles place him a lot lower now it’s time to diversify your portfolio and throw those W’s up. It’s obvious Kevin is a major talent and he will be paid like it with his next deal so now it’s up to Kevin to act like it as well. Hopefully he doesn’t do the Dwight Howard where he was supposed to create instant chips with Nash, Gasol and Kobe and instead created a media headache. Can this tandem of Love and Irving grow old together or will it last as long as the Uncle Drew commercials?  If Kevin wants to be the Great White Hope instead of the Great White Hype, the time is now to get right or will be on his Young Jeezy and say it’s all about me ok.

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Not 1…Not 2….But 3

the big 3

They say the best things in life comes in three’s whether it’s the last series of Fab’s mixtapes, threesomes, the amount of kids I have and the list goes on and on. We tend to see more usage of a Big 3 in sports particularly in basketball. Some say that this is a fad and will die off but those people probably remember Michael Jordan only on the Wizards so there basketball knowledge doesn’t count. This tactic has been used since the beginning with the Minneapolis Lakers led by George Mikan to the Celtics of the 60’s led by Bill Russell. The Big 3 component will always remain a focal point in the NBA. In recent years we have seen the Big 3 of the San Antonio Spurs, Heat, Suns, and Magic. One of my favorite Big 3 of all time was Run TMC with the Golden State Warriors. The combination of Tim Hardaway, Chris Mullin and Mitch Richmond was very exciting to watch. To see Tim do the UTEP 2-Step was like seeing a magic show live.

Well ladies and gentleman after speculation since draft day, there will be a new Big 3 in basketball residing in Cleveland, Ohio after the Cavs and Timberwolves have agreed on a deal to send Kevin Love to the Cavaliers in exchange for Andrew Wiggins, Anthony Bennett and a 2015 protected first round pick. LeBron will now be a part of 2 Big 3’s in basketball history. That isn’t uncommon as Michael Jordan, Wilt Chamberlain, Ray Allen and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar have done the same thing.

I became a basketball fan in the mid to late 80’s thanks to my grandfather who used sports to teach me how to add and subtract and perform basic math operations. Thanks, Grandpop. What were some of the greatest Big 3’s you have seen? I will give you some of my favorite Big 3 combinations not in sequential order.

  1. Golden State Warriors- Tim Hardaway, Chris Mullin and Mitch Richmond

Even though they only played together for 2 seasons they were a problem for any defense. Run TMC was the highest scoring trio in the 1990-1991 seasons. They had more than a little buzz like Chris Mullin-Wale voice. Currently, two of the three are in the Hall of Fame. When will Hardaway join them???????

2. Milwaukee Bucks- Ray Allen, Sam Cassell and Glenn Robinson

They played together for 4 years together (1998-2002) and were a team to watch. Ray Allen was feeling like Jesus Shuttlesworth when Sam Cassell was the wily vet and floor general and Big Dog in the post was a Big Dog. However they ran into a young scrappy ballplayer better known as Allen Iverson and not long after that trio disbanded.

3. Orlando Magic- Shaquille O’Neal, Penny Hardaway, Nick Anderson

This is one of the teams that benefitted from the draft lottery back in the 90’s. First they draft Shaquille O’Neal and in an unprecedented move traded Chris Webber for Penny Hardaway. In retrospect could you imagine that frontcourt of Shaq and Chris Webber? Good grief-Charlie Brown voice. Penny Hardaway was the first of tall point guard from the 90’s world drawing comparison to Magic Johnson but when they faced the Rockets for the chip and that infamous Nick Anderson at the free throw line proved too much for them. If only medical technology was as advanced then as it now when it came to Penny’s injury.

4. Oklahoma City Thunder- Kevin Durant, Russell Westbrook, James Harden

One day my son Reid will ask me about basketball and I will sit him down like Bill Russell does us in those Uncle Drew commercials. Man oh man three straight lottery selections brought together three of the top 10 players in the league but to no avail as James Harden was traded for Kevin Martin and Jeremy Lamb. I smell a 30 for 30 coming soon especially if Durant leaves OKC.

5. Boston Celtics- Ray Allen, Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett.

Anything is POSSSSSSSSSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIBBBBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEE-Kevin Garnett voice. We all know Boston is known for Big 3’s led by Russell and another one by Larry Bird. But this tandem wreaked havoc for 5 years running. Now Kevin Garnett won’t even shake Ray Allen hands.

6. Miami Heat- LeBron James, Chris Bosh, Dwyane Wade

Not one…Not two. Not three players came together and created a stir across the league. 4 straight trips the Finals, 2 MVP’s, endless memes involving Chris Bosh and the most infamous champagne shower in NBA history. I prefer Henny if I win the chip. But let’s be honest with ourselves, LeBron is the greatest player in today’s game, Wade will go down as one of the best 2 guards ever and Chris Bosh will go down and the best of something before his career is over.

7. Charlotte Hornets- Larry Johnson, Muggsy Bogues, Alonzo Mourning

The Charlotte Hornets teal uniforms and fitted hats alone are arguably the toughest uniforms of all time. But, with the combination of LJ, ZO and Muggsy were a young team worth watching every day. Whether it was LJ showing off his gold tooth and Converse, Alonzo and his high top or Muggsy and his point guard skills. Who remembers the jumper Zo hit from the foul line and sent them to the playoffs?

8. Houston Rockets- Hakeem Olajuwon, Clyde Drexler, Kenny Smith

This trio of basketball players was known for offensive efficiency. Whether it was Hakeem Olajuwon making David Robinson jump like he was at a Kris Kross concert, Clyde Drexler running the fast break like Bo Jackson in Tecmo Bowl or Kenny Smith hitting clutch jumpers this team was a force to be reckoned as they won the chip against another Big 3 (Shaq, Penny, and Nick)

9.Utah Jazz- Hornacek, Stockton, Malone

What do you go when you add a black redneck, a PG from Gonzaga and a white guy that gets dropped by Jerry Stackhouse? You give up…you get the Western Conference champions two years in row. If it wasn’t for a MJ crossover (or push however you want to look at it) on Bryon Russell who knows maybe Utah has a championship banner hanging from the rafters but for now it’s just a debate in barbershops.

10. Chicago Bulls- Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Horace Grant (or Dennis Rodman or Toni Kukoc)

I know some of y’all are thinking what took me so long to bring up Michael Jordan. Well, I didn’t want to state the obvious but in any discussion, the big Joker in the deck will always be Michael Jordan. From this union they won 6 championships and cemented one of the greatest dynasties in NBA history.

I know this isn’t my all-time list and I know I have missed some so let me know what y’all think…

 

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How I Met your Mother

how i met your mother

So at work today we are talking about our favorite show and Martin comes up especially the how they met episode. This got me to thinking about the story on how me and my wife met. This is me telling Morgan, Reid and Hannah my rendition on how we met:

I’ve been put on this earth for a decade and some years so what that make me…I’m a grown ass man. At the age of 17, I decide to further my education to become an engineer at Morgan State University. Best 4+ years of my life. Made a lot of friends, gained a lot of respect and brothers, and even got a wife there. First couple of years was like a scrimmage. I’m learning the playbook, getting acquainted with all the right people and just ready to put my foot in the door. It wasn’t until 2003 where my life as I knew it changed. I became a member of the AI version of the 92 Dream Team but you know us as the Legends. From Rob Green to Corn to Cook to Cheers to J5 to Sonny to Tony to Juce to Rell and Larry we cement a legacy still going under the leadership of Ser Wylie, FT, Geno, Whitman and many other Brothers. Mind you I’m the big boy on this gig so expectations for me were a lot higher. Just because I was big didn’t mean I could dress sloppy or not bag women or not exemplify the ethics and values of what a Legend was supposed to be. See for those that partied with me back in the day knew my ankles and feet were lightweight it’s the rest of the body especially around the mid-section that was close to 300.  Quite frankly, big fella got moves.

You know the probate happens and I get introduced to frats and sororities across the nation. But you got to have love for people that rep the same school as you so of course the bond between us was strong as shit. From this, I met a Delta named Quianna who is now my wife and mother of my kids. But Morgan, Reid and Hannah you call her mommy. Just like the Martin episode when Martin and Gina explain how they met this is where the story gets interesting.

According to Quianna, we were both walking to Morgan View not together just on the same path. It starts to pour down raining and I got my headphones with no care in the world. She has on a Delta windbreaker and maybe even a Delta umbrella as well so I knew she was a Delta but since she didn’t live in my building she would need access to get in. I walk into 1540 and the door slams. Apparently, she starts banging on the door and I look at her and kept going. Now, Quianna you mean to tell me I looked at you and kept going. What time of ignorant shit is that? You mean to tell me I had you looking like Darryl from Coming to America when Lisa dumped him. You mean to tell me that I let your Puerto Rican hair get wet and now you looking like a broccoli stem. That ain’t even in my pedigree; my mom’s raised me better than that. I can honestly say I never heard a knock at the door. Of course, this starts a vicious venom that I didn’t even know existed. I couldn’t tell because she spoke every time, gave me a hug every time like I felt no shade whatsoever. But she ain’t bang with the kid and that’s cool because I was in a different world. I felt like Dwayne Wayne without the shades and Jordan’s but still cool nonetheless.

Time goes by and it’s the 2005 Spring Probate. Everybody is excited. New Nupes on the yard. My man Gumbs got half of the school in the pit. To this day, I wondered how all these niggas know you were on but I sips yak…thanks Kermit. So of course everybody is suits and ties looking sharp then here I come with the fresh suit and top hat and the only song I could think of was watch out for the big boy…..watch out for the big boy. With the campus packed all eyes is on us and them so I get a couple of looks and what do I see… a woman with her linesisters checking the big fella out. I remain cool but just know I peeped ya shorty. It wasn’t until later that I found out she even took a picture of me. I mean we was always cool so I didn’t look at it any other way then the big fella was looking better than normal and she took notice. Normally, she saw me in a white tee with a flight jacket and scully or fitted never dressed up to the nines in fine clothing because the next day I was back to the same shit. Do I think my name every came up when she and her group of girls got together? Absolutely not so my humble hat is  on nice and tight. I mean she was far from ugly. She was really cute and not ‘cute for a big girl’ either. For the record that’s not a compliment people so for those ladies that I leaned on because you said I’m cute for a big guy that’s why. It’s a backhanded compliment so as my man Harb would say ‘cut the crap’. Back to the story, I mean I would see her in the canteen which was always jumping and we would flirt and all that then one day I put on my best combination and asked her out. Guess what she said….oh you serious, I mean I thought we was joking I mean you just Sonny to me though. To this day, I don’t know what that meant but I was ready to give her the worst leaning known to man but then I probably wouldn’t be married with 3 kids either so the lesson I learned that day was pick your battles and when you need to be serious be serious. This was hard for me to grasp because I used laughter as a defensive mechanism when things didn’t go well with the ladies because I was big and black and under no circumstance could I turn into the angry man from Martin.

A few weeks later, it’s Valentine’s Day and the NUPES were passing out chocolate covered strawberries to some of the women on campus. I wonder if some women were hiding from me on purpose because I always felt there were some that was like come save me from the big nigga. I realize quick that I wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea that didn’t mean I stop trying, I just focused on those that were. So we in the canteen and I see her and not only did I give her a strawberry, I fed her that shit too. Mad comments like ‘you go boy’, ‘that’s what I’m talking about Sonny’, ‘that’s a smooth move right there big homie’ was heard amongst the crowd. She felt good and I’m glad I was the one that was able to do it. We were having a forum that night and she approaches with the how you doing monologue and she asks me, ‘Sonny do you have a valentine’ and I was like ‘Nope what about you, she was like no’ Stop right there, I know what you thinking this is where Sonny goes for the kill but remember a few weeks prior I was just Sonny to her so instead I say ‘hi-5 better luck next year and I walk off’ I didn’t turn around to see her face. This was a pivotal move because this could have easily been the end of that friendship but it wasn’t. I wonder if she was like no this fat mothafucka didn’t…I got something for his ass. It was all love though and the same flirting continued for a few years.

It wasn’t until 2007 Homecoming in the Delta suite where I decided to approach her again. Granted, I didn’t have on the best attire. I had on a blue hoody tied up with a matching skully and Chuck Taylor’s but I was serious with my approach. She could tell I was serious and then she gave me her number. But the last 4 digits were only 2 numbers though: 0099. So in my mind I’m like man she just played the shit outta me but I’m chill because worst thing that could happen is that I holla at another girl. I think she saw the potential and we laughed about the whole number situation. I waited about 3 days and called no response. No big deal I was chillin I get a call back a day or two later and the conversation just flows naturally. It wasn’t nothing for a 4 hour conversation to occur and we had fun. We went on our first date at Friday’s and I never forgot she looked good and I had on this police jacket. Leave it up to my dad to say you wanna kill her son wear this. Everything was good it was a new avenue explored between two friends and of course this was never supposed to happen. If this was a Vegas bet I’d say 50-1 odds we would be together…that’s precisely why I don’t bet. The date is wrapping up we outside at the car and the awkward do I go for the first kiss comes about. I’m like fuck it go hard or go home but instead of locking lips I got a shiny forehead. I don’t know if it was sweat or she had the Bruce Leroy glow nevertheless she got the forehead kiss like Taye Diggs gave Nia Long in the Best Man. It wasn’t the result I was looking for but hey I went for the kill so I can live with it. We were discussing a second date and she was like I could pay for the next date and jokingly I was like ‘hell yeah do that shit’ it was all a joke but it almost cost me a second date. I’m glad she has a sense of humor. Kids fast forward to 2014 where my oldest is 5 and my youngest is a month, I got a house a couple cars and a bunch of stories that I’m about to tell. Until next time…Stay classy Planet Earth

*I wonder what her version is going to be…..

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Sticks and stones may break my bones but Words CAN hurt She

Stephen-A-Smith

For the days that I get an opportunity to DVR my favorite shows such as Game of Thrones, Boardwalk Empire and of course First Take, I get to fully analyze each episode in its entirety. Well on Friday, Stephen A. Smith and Skip Bayless were discussing the NFL ruling on Ray Rice’ suspension which was only 2 games. Quite frankly, I don’t think that is enough time and it show that Roger Goodell is inconsistent with his discipline. You can suspend a coach who is telling the players to hurt opposing players which is the object of the game according to older players for older generations and even giving them some money for a year but a man allegedly knocked a woman out and gets only 2 games. What message does that send to women? What message is the NFL conveying to women by this suspension? I say allegedly because I don’t have any ocular proof that Ray actually hit her. Based off of the surveillance tape, it looks like an unconscious woman stretched out on the ground and a man looking like a deer in headlights as to what his next move should be. My first question is why they didn’t release the tape from the elevator ride to actual show what happened. If they can show Solange going Chun-Li on Hov then why not Ray on Janay. Please don’t tell me Ray has more clout than Jay because I don’t believe that for a second. But this isn’t about the incident itself, this is about the dialogue that transpired about the ruling.

We all know Stephen A. Smith. He’s known for his sharp suits, shape-up, his vocabulary and constant yelling at Skip Bayless’ opinion to certain subjects. When Stephen A speaks, I need a dictionary or I press pause so I can understand what he is actually saying. He’s the Cornel West of the sports world. Stephen A. Smith made some comments regarding how we always discuss the end result of a domestic abuse situation which is the man hitting the woman but we never discuss the whole situation. My dad always told me there are 3 sides to every story: his side, her side and the truth. Sadly, we will never know the truth because all parties have cooperated for the betterment of themselves and not the bigger issue at hand which is domestic violence. He said let’s discuss preventative measures for both parties but ultimately no man should ever put their hands on a woman. Let’s take it a step further nobody should put their hands on nobody. Stephen A. Smith ideals and principles had logic and it made perfect sense but his delivery and wordplay was suspect which is ironic since he is known for his extensive vocabulary. If the Dave Chappelle show was still around this would be a great, “When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong”.  I agree with what Stephen A. Smith said but his words made it seem like it’s a woman’s fault that they get hit. In some cases a man and I used that word loosely in this sentence just put their hands on a woman just to flex their strength on them but this is a No Flex Zone area. I think we need to have a discussion on the accountability of all parties because it takes two to tango but in this case I don’t want to be the leader.

Is domestic abuse a one sided affair? Is it always going to be the man’s fault when this occurs? For example, UFC fighter Ronda Rousey is one of the baddest women in the planet. If she beats up her boyfriend is it still domestic abuse or she is lauded as a hero and do women begin to poke their chest out? Does she become the ambassador of what will happen if you mess with a woman? But, if the woman is the aggressor do the same rules apply. If she knocks out someone is she an abuser or was it self-defense or since he’s a man he should always be dominant than a female and overpower her. Let me remind you this woman gets paid handsomely to beat the shit out of an opponent so do we look at her man as an opponent or nah. I know men who got abused by their women but if they report it, they are referred to as a bitch, a sucker, a simp and many condescending names but if they retaliate and put their hands on a woman then they are called the same words so what if anything does a man do in this situation. If the shoe was on the other foot and Janay Palmer knocks out Ray Rice in the elevator are we looking at this case the same way? Are we saying Ray Rice was a victim of domestic abuse or are we making memes and endless jokes about how he can take a hit from a grown ass man but not from a petite female? Would Janay be faced with criminal charges?

Men must show restraint in these situations but women y’all must realize your actions as well. Is it possible that there are some women out there that have a mentality where they think nothing can happen to them because they are women but then when it gets real and something does happen, it’s a reality check that they can’t cash? I think we should be able to create a dialogue where opinions can get expressed without any conflict. Unfortunately, conflict is inevitable but abuse isn’t. Men we are in a losing situation when in conflict with a woman. From first-hand experience, I had a woman throw a drink on me because she thought I called her a bitch. I didn’t call her a bitch it was another dude that tried to spit game and got rejected and that was his response. Now that I think about it how drunk was she for her not to know which nigga was hitting on her. Nevertheless, I didn’t call her a bitch but I just got caught in the crossfire. After the drink hit my face, I was shocked, caught off guard and furious at the same damn time. Some things people should never do to each other: spit on them, throw drinks on them and throw sucker punches. Can’t lie I wanted to pop her like Mike Epps did women on How High but I know that was a movie and secondly I didn’t have any powder(Mike Epps was a pimp in that movie, I don’t know if that makes it any better but I just wanted the facts to be out in the open). So instead of throwing the haymaker from Hell, I began to restrain her but of course me being 6 feet tall and almost 300 pounds it looks like I was beating her. Now to some people I was dead ass wrong saying I should know better, some think I was too soft and should of beat the dog shit out of her and others say, Sonny you were in a lose-lose situation so damned if you do damned if you don’t. In this instance could we discuss the woman’s actions or nah. See I feel she had no right to throw a drink on me, if she was upset she could have expressed herself in a different manner but with her being a woman all the accountability was throw on me and none was thrown at her. Now if I balled my fist up and hit like a grown man, I deserve whatever repercussion that was coming my way but I just restrain her. For the record it was never an ego thing where I had to flex on her and show her who the biggest boss is because I know I am a big ass dude and that’s not a good look on me so hitting her was never an option. The lesson I learned from that was to keep myself out of areas where situations like this could happen because alcohol was flowing, emotions were running high and somebody was going to learn today-Kevin Hart voice.

Like I said earlier, I agree with what Stephen A. Smith said regarding the discussion of preventative measures because accountability needs to be shared for all the parties. But, what upsets me the most is that he says repeatedly, ‘under no circumstance should a man hit a woman’ and yet he’s getting in trouble. I think the real issue is the arena that he chose to express himself which was primetime daytime TV on one of the biggest channels in the world which is ESPN. Millions of people watch First Take every day so of course his thoughts were going to go viral. I know he didn’t have any malice in his comments but those comments would have been more appropriate in a different setting like a barber shop, poker night maybe even a family barbecue or someplace else just not on ESPN. This wasn’t the place to express himself and because of that ESPN had to make an example out of him.

Based upon his comments, Stephen A. Smith has been suspended until next Wednesday from ESPN First Take and any other ESPN affiliated shows. This suspension is about a week long which is half the suspension Ray Rice received and he actually committed the crime. Oh the irony in that shit. I wonder if Michelle Beadle, a colleague of ESPN didn’t make any comments would this suspension even happen. Even though he was bashed for his comments some people defended him most notably Whoopi Goldberg. So does she get suspended as well because they are owned by the same network? Does she get any backlash for defending Stephen A. Smith or was her delivery and word choice more tasteful and her reasoning could be understood better than what Stephen A Smith was trying to convey in his diatribe. I think Stephen A went wrong when he used the word ‘provoke’. The word ‘provoke’ came off as a trigger word which would imply that it’s a woman’s fault if she gets hit by a man and that’s not the case at all.  Like Drake said, let’s take a negative and turn it into a positive picture by talking about this issue and the impact that it has on society. Let’s start a dialogue on what can be done to prevent such a heinous crime. Let’s begin to pontificate our opinions and not denigrate someone’s experience and use words that would create such an egregious mistake (for the record that was my best Stephen A. Smith attempt if you watch the show then you know what I mean). Here’s a comment based off of the ruling by ESPN: “Stephen A Smith said nothing wrong and the suspension is outright ridiculous! The man simply expressed how women need to take more precautionary measures as it relates to domestic violence. And while doing this, he repeatedly stated that in no way, shape or form does he condone men hitting women. We keep talking about the men but we as people have to understand that women are not 100% blameless in every single domestic violence situation. DV goes both ways and I believe Stephen A just offered a bit of wisdom to women who find themselves in escalating situation. The media has taken his commentary and portrayed it as if he said it with harmful intent and I am outraged that it has gone this far. “

What are your thoughts about the above comment? What are your thoughts about this subject or ruling? Do you think Stephen A. Smith should have been suspended? Have you been victims of domestic abuse, if so were they preventative measures that could have been used to prevent this situation from escalating? Have you abused someone and if so why did you do it? Let me know your thoughts and for the record.

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